Bounce!

It's Liz's birthday on Friday which coincides perfectly with the Big Freedia show at Holocene. Big Freedia is the queen of New Orleans Bounce. I don't know. I have never really kept up on all the different regional hip-hop stuff (not exactly a purveyor of hip-hop culture) and find it embarrassing to make people explain hyphy to me and whatnot. It's not like I'm at expert on Bounce or anything, I just happened to be perusing the Holocene website and thought it sounded fun. The music is fast and dirty with an emphasis on  shaking your lower region as quickly as possible. There are various videos of live shows that I could post in illustration but I'm pretty sure this one is my favorite.You really have to love video that involves a boombox.

Totally Awesome and Not Inexpensive

Look at these! As I've said before, Etsy is a perilous place. You start out looking at hand-knitted socks for your loved ones and suddenly find yourself in a dark forest filled with dangerous rough-cut gems and silver rings of power. And guess where they're from? The Midwest. Who knew it could be such a magical place?

Midwest Alchemy

Inexpensive and Totally Awesome

Welcome to my gift-giving guide.

We all know that Christmas is a time when resources are tight. I am working on keeping my credit card bills down, and while I love to pride myself on how financially organized I am, my mother totally sent me the hey-have-you-paid-your-car-insurance email which I responded to with bewilderment and then called my agent only to find my mother had paid it. Yesterday. Total embarrassment.

Anyway, I have some tips on keeping your budget down and the excitement and gratitude levels high this year. Feel free to share your own in the comments.

Give the gift of experience: While this can be classy and pricey (spa-trip for two in romantic Tucson! scuba diving lesson! pole dancing classes!), it can also be an affordable solution. Buy a nice card, write out the details of a special day that you will theoretically make happen for the recipient, voucher for back rubs, future drinks purchased, etc. and then give. It's especially good to give when it's something that you will enjoy as well. There is a possibility that they will lose this card in the holiday gift-giving fray but this only works to your advantage. This puts the gift-receiving in their court and they have to acknowledge that the thought was there.

Socks!: While no one actually likes to receive socks, everyone needs them. Unless the socks are woefully too small, the recipient will end up wearing them at some point, and at that point they will think of you. Success! I like to put the socks in a really, really large box so it looks like you are giving something very exciting like a microwave.

DIY: Do-it-yourself is back with a vengeance and the possibilities are endless. Crochet a scarf, pickle something, brew your own Kahlua, paint a plate, infuse your own vodka, olive oil, or something else that can be infused. It helps to be somewhat good at what you're doing, but the thought counts thing applies here. I once received a hat with my initials and some weird buttons sewn on it. It was an oddly depressing hat but that doesn't mean I didn't appreciate it. That being said, I don't recommend distributing button-covered stocking caps this year.

Presentation Counts: If you are like me, no one really expects anything of you. In high school you were too self-centered for gift giving, in college you were too poor. Now that you maybe have a little disposable income it's not mandatory that you suddenly come through with lavish treats for everyone you know. In fact, it would probably seem out of character. Something thoughtful, personalized and well-wrapped is the way to go. As long as it's exciting to open, it's appreciated. In other words, don't give your best friend a candle swaddled in a plastic bag from Fred Meyer.

Film Noir Fairy Tales

The next three weeks are going to be wonderful for several reasons. Snowboarding is getting good, I love crappy Christmas music, and there are birthdays and parties and all sorts of festive things to do. Yet another good thing? Gabe finally got the Red Riding Trilogy from the Portland library and we have three weeks to watch it. The trilogy was originally broadcast on U.K. television, and as I understand it, is an examination of the corruption of social foundations in Yorkshire. Each film has a different director and the trilogy spans from 1974 to 1980 to 1983. Moral corruption! Film noir! Yorkshire!

Here's a synopsis of the first one from Slant Magazine:

Julian Jarrold's Red Riding: 1974 kickstarts the proceedings by focusing on Eddie Dunford (Andrew Garfield), a rookie journalist who, like the protagonists of the subsequent 1980 and 1983, is returning to Yorkshire after time away. Back on native soil mere days after the death of his father, Eddie sees careerist opportunity in the abduction case of 10-year-old Clare Kemplay, a figurative Red Riding Hood (replete with crimson hoodie) whose disappearance he soon surmises may be linked to two similar missing kids in the region. Driven by a strain of young-turk ambition that, as suggested by the environment's cigarette smoke-decorated nastiness, can only lead to ruin, Eddie makes the cardinal sin of all noir chumps, believing himself to be more (or at least different) than he truly is. It's a mistake that plays out not only through his investigation into Clare, whose body is suspiciously discovered in a construction site owned by local development magnate John Dawson (Sean Bean) with swan wings stitched to her back, but his eventual amorous relationship with Paula Garland (Rebecca Hall), the mother of one of the other missing girls. 

Here's the trailer:



We're watching 1974 tonight!

I'm so sorry

I have been extremely, horribly busy with work. Things were rough. I couldn't even look at a computer screen after work. So that's why nothing was happening here for awhile. But it's over. There are a lot of pressing issues I could discuss, but here are some things that have been torturing me lately. Think of these as my atonement for not entertaining you every day.

Long socks/skinny jeans: It's so hard. You pull up your socks. You pull down your pants. And then you end up with the socks rolled, halfway down your shin, protruding from your jeans like a weird tumor. I really liked that look in third grade for some reason, but it wasn't good then and it definitely is not a good thing now. Putting on socks should not be on the same difficulty scale as algebra.

Marriage talks at Thanksgiving: Last year I was told by my aunt that I should find a nice man to support me so I could stay home and presumably raise our brood. Then my uncle told me, shouted down the table really, that the Bachelor was too young for me and that I needed to find a man my own age and settle down. Awkward. This year was an improvement, as I was only asked by one cousin, in a relatively casual way, if I was married yet. I think having my boyfriend at dinner helped to stave off the raving accusations.

Random skin disorders: I am horribly allergic to poison oak. Like, welts and blisters and full-body hives allergic. I picked up a tiny patch of poison ivy out in Indiana back in October and my skin hasn't been the same since. The other day one of my eyes was half swelled shut and I was just sitting there, hunched over the computer, groaning and rubbing my Quasimodo face. I'm going to the dermatologist today. Pretty excited about it. I hope she gives me a shot and just like, cures me.