August 10, 2010

Things I did in Portland this weekend

I was kind of sick all weekend. Disappointing, and the weather was fittingly morbid. But some things happened all the same. Charissa and I had an adventure involving all those stupid roads in SW that don't connect to anything, sweaty neoprene, piles of dirty clothing, and Otto's sausages.

First we got hopelessly lost while trying to find the surf shop out on Macadam. She sat with me while I tried on wetsuits (occasionally jumping up to peel or tug or make sportscaster-style comments). If you ever want to not be attracted to someone, you should sit in a hot dressing room with them and watch them try on wetsuits. I'm not saying Charissa was attracted to me beforehand. But if there was ever a hope, it is now forever and completely dashed.

Then we went to The BINS. It was my first Goodwill Bins experience. It's way out on 99, just a bit past Acropolis. You can buy clothing by the pound. The Pound. There are men running around with fresh tables of clothing and people jump on it like vultures and we kept finding these crazy obese harem pants (it seems to be a theme). I got Back to the Future on VHS. So that trip wasn't a waste. We were both feeling ill and tired and light-headed from all the used clothing fumes and I suggested ribs as a restorative measure.

So we wandered out to the Delta Cafe on a ribs mission (I say wandered because we weren't really sure where it was and again, we got kind of lost). Unfortunately we arrived at the desolate moment between dinner and lunch when the Delta is not at all open. Was in fact closed. We went straight to Otto's down the street in desperation and sat at a picnic table and had a hot dog. The weird thing was that there were like, 15 teenage boys lurking behind the deli counters, an excessive amount of teenage boys all aproned up, doing absolutely nothing, watching us as we tried five of each sample (which all turned out to be the same kind of summer sausage.)

I finished up the day with Back to the Future.

1 comment:

Charisstopher said...

4 pairs of insanely large pants! Like, can't even bring them to their full width with arms outstretched! I'm still REELING.