July 21, 2010

Oh no

American Apparel appears to be on a quest to fill the world with mom-butt. I'm really not sure why this is happening but I imagine something kind of like this:

Two women (top designers/sales girls/models) are sitting in a 70s porn style family room/office. Wood paneling and beige carpet. One wears jeggings and a crop top. The other is in boat shoes, bloomers and one of those crazy plastic visors that old Asian ladies wear. Designer A does a small bump off the formica coffee table.

A: You know what would be really funny?
B: What?
A: If we did early 90s American suburban pants. Like, high-waisted sweatpants and awkward pegged slacks. You know that cut of jeans that you can't even give away at a thrift shop? It's like, vaguely familiar because their moms were wearing them throughout their childhood. It's like going back to the womb.
B: But everyone in the world will have long flat butts.
A: And that bothers you?
B: Actually, it doesn't. Let's do turtlenecks next! Remember thin cotton turtlenecks?
A: One step at a time, my young apprentice. One step at a time.


shola said...

rachel! i fell for these aa pants (minus the elastic ankle part) and surprisingly they're pretty fucking cute! pair them with a faded/peach-colored embroidered blouse, brown leather heels, and a headband with a birds nest and you have yourself an outfit. (granted my ass does look like a little like a deflated ballon)ha!

Rachel Wrong said...

Shola, I'm going to need to see some photographic proof.