Tipping Point

My shoe buying moratorium is over! These are rushing to my doorstep right now. I have been dreaming of them* for months and in a matter of days I will be able to stomp around in these things and intimidate people with my incredible height like Godzilla or Yao Ming or some other freakish creature. They are the shoe fantasy of Morticia Adams and Elton John's dutch love child. Be prepared to be terrified.

P.S. I sent a link of these to Kyle Arthur a while ago and asked him what he thought. He said they looked like Chinese footbinding shoes (in other words, hideous). I told him to judge me if I suddenly showed up wearing them because I was on a no-shoe buying responsibility kick and was in need of some moral reinforcement.

P.P.S. Kyle Arthur. I know I said I wouldn't buy them, but this was before I elected not to have surgery. Prior request has been nullified.

* They are Jeffrey Cambell's 99. Sold out everywhere. Based on the far more pricey Acne wedge. Got them off Ebay.